22 December 2011

We Need To Talk

I met his friends last night. He decided I should meet them, so we went to nickel draft night at a local country bar. It was actually a lot of fun. But I got drunk and started talking.

The topic of a relationship came up. I was rambling about commitment issues at the beginning and then admitting we're pretty much dating as it is. Luckily, he was sober enough to decide to save that conversation for a time when we're both sober.

We were supposed to meet after work, but things came up on both our ends. On the phone he said he wanted to continue our conversation. I told him I was drunk and an idiot, to completely ignore anything I said.  That it wasn't something totally pressing. However, he still wishes to have that conversation.

It seems we're both messed up in the relationship department. I've been in emotionally abusive relationships and am still grieving the death of my friend. His last girlfriend committed suicide while they were together. I think he won.


jamiessmiles said...

I don't think it is a contest. It's good that you are talking. Maybe someone with his own issues will be more understanding of yours.

Big a said...

i have to agree sigi ... there is no competition when it comes to having pain in life.

we just all have to learn from our hard times ... i hope that you keep learning and growing ... trust me ... it's worth it xo

Jems said...

Dear Jess, I read your blog for the first time today...i had smile on face and tears in eyes ..i realized you are going through 1000 times stronger emotions than I was ... You are a strong person. life is beautiful just like you.... there are people all around you who love you... take care of yourself... dont be scared to let some one special in...love you

Tabs A. Geek said...

There is no competition Jess, my dear. You can't really say which is worse because they all affect each of us differently.

I think talking is a good thing. It may be that the two of you will be able to work your way forward together -- that doesn't mean having to dive head first in a relationship, it could just mean being the rock that helps each other stand and start to move forward