The Best Night I've Had In A Long Time

I just got home and it's just past 3am. But it's cool because I don't have work for fourteen hours give or take. I'm still slightly buzzed and elated from everything that just happened.

Disclaimer: I'm still buzzed from the bar therefore this gets very explicit.

While at work, Erika and I decided that we were going out afterwards. We needed to plan my Halloween costume for the big party and maybe we wanted a drink. Or two. I was scheduled off before she was, but she had come in a few hours earlier, so fingers crossed we'd get out around the same time.

An hour of waiting, a phone call from the Momz, and we were off. Momz requested I picked her up at work since she was on the motorcycle and there was a thunderstorm abrewing. Completely understandable, and since we were only planning on going to our local 24hour Walmart, Erika and I didn't mind.

We took the trip back to my place, met Momz, who ended up just taking the coat I brought and decided to driver herself since the rain had stopped, back to my place to change into nicer clothes. Nice clothes meaning, clothes that aren't work clothes. Dressed in low cut shirts, wedge heels, and a touch of makeup, we drove the half hour trip back into town.

We made our first stop to Walmart and I found my costume. I'm going to be a fallen angel. I bought black wings, I might wear Erika's black corset, fishnets, heels. I'm just not sure about the bottoms. I can't decide what sort of skirt to wear. Frustrating. Now, to the bar!

Drunk Birthday

My 22nd birthday was on the 7th and I should have written this post the day after but I've been avoiding the computer for some reason lately. I suck.

The day started with me leaving the house to beautify. I got a french manipedi, my hair cut, and my eyebrows done. Seriously guys, I cut my hair. Like five inches went from my head to the ground. It's much shorter than I wanted, but what's done is done and hair grows back. From that, I drove down the street to grab some lunch and some booze.

I'm sitting in a drive through and my car starts freaking out. Luna starts sputtering, stalling, and refusing to work. I manage to get out of line and into a spot but I know my clutch is dead. Thank you Luna for your amazing birthday gift, the amazing disappearing clutch. It rocked. I called my uncle, told him what happened, and asked him to come get me. I then called Erika that I wouldn't be at her house as soon as I had planned. Sitting at a McDonald's for close to two hours is no picnic my dears.

After much struggle, my car ends up being towed back to my house. Uncle offers to drive me to Erika's so I don't miss my own birthday party. I grabbed my bags and hop in, happy I actually get to end the night on a better note. She wasn't home when I got there, so I let myself in and start getting dressed. I'm all done up with my new do, killer heels, skinny jeans, and a shirt that makes my boobs the main attraction.

Stood Up

Well today was a day. I hate hangovers. I hate that I'm actually starting to get hangovers.

I got off work just before 11pm last night. I run to Walmart, buy some beer, and scoot my butt over to Andy's for the party. Given the late hour, I'm greeted by drunk faces, a hug from Melvin, and a dirty look from Jeremiah. I immediately open a beer and relax with people out on the porch. My total count by the end of the night was two beers and three shots of rum. I know, I'm embarrassed of myself too. That is such a small list. I did also hit the shit out of the elephant. Yes, elephant. Someone had an elephant bowl and that was fucking awesome. You smoked out of its trunk, epic. I ended up puking my guts out, partially on myself, but Melvin was nice and held my hair back. Thankfully I had a change of pants in my car since I had a date today, so I changed in the bathroom and passed out on Andy's bed. Who came in an hour or so later, talked to me for a few minutes, then passed out himself. I'm pretty sure he tried cuddling with me, I kept feeling an arm reach out to me. In response to that, I slept on the couch.

When I woke up this morning around 10am, I realized my pants were inside out. No wonder I had so much trouble buttoning them the night before. I couldn't find my flip flops inside anywhere, so I just grabbed my purse and walked outside. I found one on the porch, the other half way across the yard. I drove off chewing gum and went to the laundromat. I needed to wash my puke covered jeans, I needed them for work. On the way I texted Michael to let him know I was wicked hungover and physical activity was going to be too much to ask of me. So I didn't exactly stand him up, only kind of. I washed a total of two outfits, I'm such a weirdo I had dirty clothes in my car. I bought myself Subway but felt nauseous after two bites. Sitting on the floor wearing sunglasses, practically falling asleep, with sketchy ghetto black guys... Yeah, that was my morning. As soon as my clothes were done, which never happened since I took them out still damp, I left and went to my nana's empty place and passed out until forever.

I walked out to my car shirtless to get my things to get ready for work. I hope the neighbor lady enjoyed my bra. I got dressed and drove to work an hour early, I was fucking stahving and the leftover sub I had was gross from sitting for hours. Ick. I got my coffee coolatta on the way and enjoyed my greasy fried food when I got there. My tire was a little low but was okay to drive on. But a few hours later, I'm told its on the rim. Lunayoufuckingpieceofshitcar.

I have a flat spare, no jack, and no one to come save me. The supervisor lets me take her car to fill up my spare, but once I do that I realize its the tire that's warped beyond belief and therefore useless. Once back at the store, someone lets me borrow their jack. Silly boy started explaining how to jack up a car, I laughed. The boys were acting all concerned, it was funny. I got my car jacked up and the tire off with a little fighting, I had to sit there and kick it off. The second I got it off, Tj came out to help me. Such timing. But he was in a good mood and drove me to the gas station to fill the tire on the chance it was just a leak and I didn't run over something destroying the tire. Thankfully that's what it seemed to be, we didn't find any holes and it stayed inflated, even after we drove back and put it back on my car. It got me home at least.

I came home to chicken nuggets and french fries. I made some awesome sweet tea and laughed at my crazy kitten who is in one of those killer cat moods. My head still hurts, my stomach still wants to die. I feel a little guilty, a little lonely. I'm still unsure about everything, but at least I got one night off from myself.

I Hate Myself

I'm finally home after two days and I've washed off the scent of regret. Hopefully I won't cry myself to sleep again tonight or cause another coworker to quit. It's been a tough day to say the least.

I had a date last night. We went to a fun restaurant where the waiter was an adorable gay man and had delicious drinks. I was buzzed by the time I was too stuffed to continue eating. I actually had a good time and we decided to continue the night. We bought more drinks and went to my nana's empty house to watch movies. He immediately tried cuddling with me, kissing me on the cheek and head while I was hanging on to my drink for dear life. Every time he went for my hand I said I was holding hands with my bottle every time he tried to kiss me, I'd turn my head. Eventually though I did give in, made out for two seconds, he choked me, ate me out. I refused to let him touch me afterwards. I was slightly ashamed.

The night contined with the movie. Eventually we cuddled on the couch and I let him stay in the guest bed with me. We hooked up. I had sex with Coworker and I hate myself for it. The second it ended, which was when I pushed him off, I left and shut myself in the bathroom. I immediately started crying. I felt so horrible and mixed up. I'm still in love with someone else and I just boned a guy. I'm horrible. I slept in my nana's room and cried myself to sleep. Violent, heart breaking sobs. I honestly felt so low on the social scale that I didn't feel like I deserved any compassion for the pain I was feeling. When I woke up, he kept asking if I was mad at him. I simply said I was mad at myself and told him to go to work.

Work was awkward to say the least. I didn't want to talk to him, so I kept giving him one word answers. Towards the end of the night, J suddenly asked me what I did to make Coworker quit. I was so confused, I mean this just happened last night. I was teased for the remainder of the night, I got more than one funny looks. Though that could be about the hickey I desperately tried to cover with a pound of coverup. I was later told he was bragging about his back because of the scratches. I was pretty pissed.

Revamping and Halloween Stories

When I have bouts of insomnia, it apparently ends in another new look for the page. I like this one, so maybe it'll stay this way for awhile. I spent forever on the new banner and it's a little big but I'm just fine with that. I'm supposed to be up in about five hours and out the door in six. I doubt I'm going to get more than a short nap. Tea and coffee are just going to have to be my best friends now aren't they.

Since I'm going slightly crazy from boredom I'll share a story. This takes place a few days before Halloween of 2009 while I was living in Salem, Ma. I was invited to a costume party in Lynn, just a town over, and I was pretty excited as I had choosen to dress up as Billy Mays that year. You all remember Billy Mays right, the amazing man who screamed at you to buy his cleaning products? Yeah, I love him. I looked quite amazing, especially next to Michael Jackson. Yep, my best friend, Mal, went as the one and only MJacks. She was probably the best MJacks impersonator you could hope to see.