Ugh

It's 2am, and I've only been home for half an hour. My six hour shift at work turned into an 8 1/2 hour shift. I forgot my shirt and had to run to WalMart for a black shirt, at least I got one on sale. I twisted my ankle because dipshits decided to let the trashcan overflow and let plastic bags fall on the floor. Losing your footing because you slipped on a sandwich bag sucks. I was limping half the night, my right foot pointed inward, and it kills like a sonuvabitch. I got lost driving on the Air Station, I need a goddamn map for that place. But at least I got 54$ in tips. Filled my tank from the last two days. Btdubbs, you shouldn't go through a tank of gas in two days because of work, and my car is good on gas.

I am still convinced Chris is flirting with me. I still miss Melvin. I want to get laid and might call Shane tomorrow. I am now kind of missing relationships. My chest itches from some random bug bite. I'm tired. I'm ranting. I need tiger blood. Or a zombie apocalypse.

My Zombie Dream

A few weeks ago I had a very strange dream. None of it made sense, the only thing I was concerned with was the zombie apocalypse it obviously predicted. I'm now sharing it with you so you'll know how to protect yourself.

I was attending a cookout at my house in the middle of Suburbia with my college friends, Mal and Laura. Mac and Dennis from Always Sunny just arrived and we needed more food before Dee and Charlie got there. So Laura, Mal, and myself left the cookout to go to the store. We got side tracked and ended up in the parking lot between Papa Gino's and Sports World and realized we need to catch the P&B bus if we were ever going to get to Salem. Just as the bus was pulling away, we remembered Laura had her car. We took the bikes that mysteriously appeared at our sides and returned back home to get the car.

Back at the house, the three of us hop in the car and drive to our high school ten minutes away, regardless of the fact none of us met until college. We sneak through a door in the loading dock and start walking away. We had the plan of causing mischief as a slightly sad prank on our most hated teachers. Halfway down the hall, someone runs in Laura and both of them fall to the ground. Mal and I help them both to their feet and we get a good look at this stranger. It was boy, who was all cut up and had blood all over. He started screaming like a crazy person. He kept repeating, "They're everywhere...Everywhere." Mal shook him and demanded who he was talking about. He pointed to the end of the hall and said "Zombies". At that moment, one began limping around the corner.

Pros and Cons of Being a Zombie

Zombie

a person held to resemble the so-called walking dead

Merriam - Webster

a dead person who is believed, in some Caribbean religions, to have been brought back to life by magic

Cambridge

reanimated corpse that feeds on tle flesh of the living. Can be exterminated by destroying the brain, or removing the brain from the body.

Urban Dictionary

Zombies have been pretty popular for quite some time now. There's countless movies revolving around them, books, survival guides, walks consisting of thousands of college aged students made up to look like them. But what does it really mean to be a zombie? What would it be like to wake up tomorrow as a zombie and have the irresitable urge to pop open someone's skull and munch their brain like a bag of Cheetos? Well wonder no more, I'm going to do all the dirty work for you and dissect the situation. Now, why do I we all want to be a zombie!